68.2%

so.. how does it feel to fail the chemical engineering licensure exams?

it hurt..
but it didn't really last.
i cried for 20 min then decided to move on.
i still got teary eyed for the next few days but i got over it.
now,
i still hurt..
but it's just a deeper pain that doesn't really show on the outside.
it happens when you congratulate your friends or when you see those passing lists posted somewhere..
of course i'm happy for them, but i'm sad for myself.
hehe.

the moment eula texted me, "may results na.." panic.
grabe.
then the moment of truth..
*heart squeeze*
pagtingin sa "a", wala yung dapat andun?!
wala na..
hindi ko na nahintay ang "j"..
umiyak na ko.
kung wala siya sa list, malamang wala na din ako.
and yep.
wala nga.

in fairness, buti positive padin ako.
alam ko namang hindi ako tanga.
hindi lang siguro ako ganun ka-prepared.
or malas lang sa biochem.
i guess alam ni Lord na hindi pa dapat.
kulang pa daw ako sa kaalaman.
hehe.
ang kidder talaga ni Lord..

pero salamat..
sa mga magulang ko na ang sabi ay "ok lang yan. try na lang ulit."
sa friends ko na sabi "kaya mo yan jans. may next time pa."
sa kapatid ko na sabi "ate? ok ka lang?"
at sa sarili ko na laging sinasabing "may april pa. i'll be better."
hahahaha!
salamat ng marami. :)

anyway, gusto ko lang mang galing sakin na di ako pumasa.
but don't worry, malalagay din sa newspaper ang pangalan ko sa april.
yeba!
:D

-jans

bigyan niyo kami ng internet!!

wah!! ilang buwan na ako hindi nakaka-net ng matino!

di ko man lang mabasa yung mga online comics na inaabangan ko.. (mga 20+ din yun)

di ko lang man ma-check ang accounts ko regularly.. (mail, friendster, facebook, multiply)

di man lang ako maka-chat sa mga tao.. (namimiss ko na ang mga taong gising ng early morning)

di man lang ako maka-aksaya ng oras sa net! hahaha!

haaayy.. please naman, bigyan niyo na kami ng net. maawa kayo.. :(

ps. mahirap maging pulubi.. bow.

pps. wah!! nakakamiss mag blog ng may sense!

ppps. eto ay isang blog na walang sense.

pppps. inuman na!!

ppppps. namimiss ko na sumayaw, mag wall climbing at mag swimming. weeeh... mahirap maging bum. whoo!

***

asshole

rock-paper-scissors-lizard-Spock

"Rock, paper, scissors, lizard, Spock. It's very simple. Look --
scissors cuts paper
paper covers rock
rock crushes lizard
lizard poisons Spock
Spock smashes scissors
scissors decapitates lizard
lizard eats paper
paper disproves Spock
Spock vaporizes rock
and as it always has, rock crushes scissors."

-- Sheldon Cooper in The Big Bang Theory Episode 8 Season 2, The Lizard-Spock Expansion

*

why do i always give up?.. i lack faith.. hope.. certainty.. in almost everything i do.. i know i "go with the flow".. but sometimes, actually i think most of the time, i just lack courage.. i'm too much of a chickenshit to do anything about my life and the things that happen in it.. i nees to be taught a good lesson on courage.. and belief.. and risks.. i need to be a better person..

* just a reflection

Numerology: What Your Name Means (Part 2)

sabi kasi ni alex try ko daw na may middle name.=p o dodo, mas okay ba to or di padin kapanipaniwala?=p hehe.=p
------------------------------------

You entered: Jansell Loseo Jamero

There are 18 letters in your name.
Those 18 letters total to 66
There are 8 vowels and 10 consonants in your name.

Your number is: 3

The characteristics of #3 are: Expression, verbalization, socialization, the arts, the joy of living.

The expression or destiny for #3:
An Expression of 3 produces a quest for destiny with words along a variety of lines that may include writing, speaking, singing, acting or teaching; our entertainers, writers, litigators, teachers, salesmen, and composers. You also have the destiny to sell yourself or sell just about any product that comes along. You are imaginative in your presentation, and you may have creative talents in the arts, although these are more likely to be latent. You are an optimistic person that seems ever enthusiastic about life and living. You are friendly, loving and social, and people like you because you are charming and such a good conversationalist. Your ability to communicate may often inspire others. It is your role in life to inspire and motivate; to raise the spirits of those around you.

The negative side of number 3 Expression is superficiality. You may tend to scatter your forces and simply be too easygoing. It is advisable for the negative 3 to avoid dwelling on trivial matters, especially gossip.

Your Soul Urge number is: 8

A Soul Urge number of 8 means:
With an 8 soul urge, you have a natural flair for big business and the challenges imposed by the commercial world. Power, status and success are very important to you. You have strong urges to supervise, organize and lead. Material desires are also very pronounced. You have good executive abilities, and with these, confidence, energy and ambition.

Your mind is analytical and judgment sound; you're a good judge of material values and also human character. Self-controlled, you rarely let emotions cloud judgment. You are somewhat of an organizer at heart, and you like to keep those beneath you organized and on a proper track. This is a personality that wants to lead, not follow. You want to be known for your planning ability and solid judgment.

The negative aspects of the 8 soul urge are the often dominating and exacting attitude. You may have a tendency to be very rigid, sometimes stubborn.

Your Inner Dream number is: 4

An Inner Dream number of 4 means:
You dream of being a very solid citizen that people can depend upon. You strive for organization and predictable order. You want to be recognized as a person with a plan and the discipline to make that plan work like clockwork.

Numerology: What Your Name Means

nakita ko kay alex.. naintriga ako. hehe. hmm.. tama ba?
----------------

You entered: Jansell Jamero

There are 13 letters in your name.
Those 13 letters total to 45
There are 5 vowels and 8 consonants in your name.

Your number is: 9

The characteristics of #9 are: Humanitarian, giving nature, selflessness, obligations, creative expression.

The expression or destiny for #9:
The expression that you exhibit is represented by the number 9. Your talents center in humanistic interests and approaches. You like to help others as you were intended to be the 'big brother or big sister' type. You operate best when you follow your feelings and sense of compassion, and allow yourself to be sensitive to the needs of others. You work well with people, and have the potential to inspire. This suggests that you could successfully teach or counsel. Creative ability, imagination and artistic talent (often latent) of the highest order are present in this expression. It's possible that you're not using or developing all of these capabilities at this time. Some of your talents may have been used at an earlier time in your life, and some may still be latent. Be aware of your capabilities, so that you can make use of them at appropriate times.

If you are able to achieve the potential of your natural expression in this life, you are capable of much human understanding and have a lot to give to others. Your personal ambitions are likely to be maintained in a very positive perspective, never losing sight of an interest in people, and a sympathetic, tolerant, broad-minded and compassionate point of view. You are quite idealistic, and disappointed at the lack of perfection in the world. You have a strong awareness of your own feeling as well as those of others. Friendships, affection, and love are extremely important.

Undeveloped or ignored, the negative side of the 9 expression can be very selfish and self-centered. If you do not actively involve yourself with work that benefits others, you may tend to express just the opposite characteristics. It is your role to be very involved with other people and their needs, but it may be difficult for you achieve this role. Aloofness, lack of involvement, and a lack of sensitivity mark the low road of this expression.

Your Soul Urge number is: 9

A Soul Urge number of 9 means:
With a 9 Soul Urge, you want to give to others, usually in a humanitarian or philanthropic manner. You are highly motivated to give friendship, affection and love. And you are generous in giving of your knowledge and experience. You have very sharing urges, and you are likely to have a great deal to share. Your concern for others makes you a very sympathetic and generous person with a sensitive and compassionate nature.

You are able to view life in very broad and intuitive terms. You often express high ideals and an inspirational approach to life. If you are able to fully realize the potential of your motivation, you will be a very self-sacrificing person who is able to give freely without being concerned about any return or reward.

As with all human beings, you are prone to sometimes express the negative attitudes inherent to your Soul Urges. You may become too sensitive and tend to express emotions strongly at times. There can be significant conflict between higher aims and personal ambitions. You may resent the idea of giving all of the time and, in fact, if there is too much 9 energy in your nature you may reject the idea. You may often be disappointed in the lack of perfection in yourself and others.

Your Inner Dream number is: 9

An Inner Dream number of 9 means:
You dream of being creative, intellectual, and universal; the selfless humanitarian. You understand the needy and want to help them. You would love to be a person people count on for support and advice.

-----------------------------
here's the link: PaulSadowski.com

How to destroy the Earth

(by Sam Hughes)

Destroying the Earth is harder than you may have been led to believe.

You've seen the action movies where the bad guy threatens to destroy the Earth. You've heard people on the news claiming that the next nuclear war or cutting down rainforests or persisting in releasing hideous quantities of pollution into the atmosphere threatens to end the world.

Fools.

The Earth is built to last. It is a 4,550,000,000-year-old, 5,973,600,000,000,000,000,000-tonne ball of iron. It has taken more devastating asteroid hits in its lifetime than you've had hot dinners, and lo, it still orbits merrily. So my first piece of advice to you, dear would-be Earth-destroyer, is: do NOT think this will be easy.

This is not a guide for wusses whose aim is merely to wipe out humanity. I (Sam Hughes) can in no way guarantee the complete extinction of the human race via any of these methods, real or imaginary. Humanity is wily and resourceful, and many of the methods outlined below will take many years to even become available, let alone implement, by which time mankind may well have spread to other planets; indeed, other star systems. If total human genocide is your ultimate goal, you are reading the wrong document. There are far more efficient ways of doing this, many which are available and feasible RIGHT NOW. Nor is this a guide for those wanting to annihilate everything from single-celled life upwards, render Earth uninhabitable or simply conquer it. These are trivial goals in comparison.

This is a guide for those who do not want the Earth to be there anymore.